Christmas Happened

So. It's been a while, again. Nate is now a huge person who speaks in sentences and constructs hilarious ones using his very own brain. His current favourite is 'there's a chicken egg in my bum'.




Anyway, Christmas is happening in Auld Reekie. I'm chuffed as its my favourite time of year - especially now I can properly teach Nate what it is all about.


We went, with Jen, to see the lights getting put on. Thanks to the sudden onslaught of wind and rain the fireworks etc were cut short, nevertheless Nate had a great time. He kept shouting unintentional obscenities and loudly pretending to sneeze while the Mayor of Iceland (or somewhere) spoke and made us dance to the Christmas songs and literally vibrated with excitement and joy when the light show was on. It brought a tear to my eye. Happy Nate makes me happy, as does the German Market and Schneeeeeman Pooooonsch :D

Amusing things said by Nate today...

Is the beach a bit dangerous

I need a happy dragon

I want to go to work RIGHT NOW

My willy fell out

I want to make beef

When little fingers go in hinges...

I'm a disaster area; I'm clumsy, unlucky, unfortunate, careless, I'm a giant accident waiting to happen. So is my son, it seems.

In Saturday morning. The 2AM sort of morning and little, adorable Nate decides it's time to wake up and take himself for a little wander in the dark. He didn't get far because he decided it wise to get his tiny little left ring finger WEDGED HORRIFICALLY in his door, hinge side!

Chris was first out of bed, of this I am glad, he had to deal with dislodging said finger from said door while Nate tried to tear it out himself, he also had to see it first, and to be the person the blood sprayed onto like something from a horror movie. Despite my adamantine laced stomach I doubt I'd have been able to deal with that. I'd have fumbled and fussed and panicked loudly while trying to work out the logistics of freeing him without causing further damage. Chris just got him out and got him sorted - not without panic but without whatever it would have been that would have made me doing it disastrous.

It was bad, and he was bleeding a lot. Fortunately the ambulance support arrived swiftly and minutes later the ambulance and Nate started to calm down. Relief for us all as that choking, sobbing, uncontrollable cry that only happens in real, severe instances of pain and has never been heard from our boy before was heartbreakingly unbearable.

Riding in the ambulance




In A&E




Anyway, we went to hospital. Nate got some Calpol and anti-biotics and the doctor paid us a visit. He slotted Nates crushed, cut in half, gory mess of a finger back together, taped it up and gave him a bandage so beastly it resembled a boxing glove. We were to return home and go back to the Sick Kids hospital for 9.30 am so we could have his hand X-rayed and see the plastic surgeon to see how best to fix his poor finger properly. Of course by the time we got home it was near 6am. Chris and Nate got a little sleep. I was still on an adrenaline rush so managed a ten minute snooze. Up at 7.30 and off to hospital.

Before going back to Sick Kids




Nate was in fine spirits and adjusted to his new, useless and oversized hand and was a very good boy in hospital. Asking to go home only a few times and being cranky once or twice due to tiredness was as bad as he got, so not bad at all! He was polite and adorable to all the nurses (who were great with him), and the sour pussed old witches on reception. Saying thank you at all the right moments and causing no fuss when something needed checked or medicine dispensed. Hooray! Nate was going to need surgery with general anaesthetic so we were in for a long day. He rode Lightning McQueen to the anaesthetist and didn't even flinch when they put things into his good hand to put him under.

Nate took a well deserved nap right after surgery




Having toast


With Daddy reading Spider-Man



Everything was a success. And he finally got to eat and drink when he woke up. He was also presented with a certificate for being in theatre and being brave. He certainly was a brave boy throughout the entire ordeal, as well as polite, well behaved and adorable. I couldn't be more proud of how he handled the long, tough day. He got pizza and cake and presents from all over. Luckyyyyy!

Mint aero chocolate uber-cake

Location:Edinburgh,United Kingdom

Two...

Hello, it has been a while. As always life had got in my way but I am back to announce that Nate is TWO. He is officially the age where he is fully allowed to be terrible, troublesome, turbulent and tantrum throwing - he had been getting plenty of practice in so no doubt he will be a seasoned pro in no time.

This week, his Nana, Gramps and cousin Mylo came to stay and it was lovely. We had not seen any of them since last summer - June I think - so Nate has changed dramatically since then. Of course they see pictures and videos on Facebook but it is not quite the same. Nathaniel was mostly good and poor Mylo did a good job of putting up with him. Mylo is coming up to 5 this Summer and the age gap is sometimes seemed like a tremendous gulf between them. Of course, Nathaniel adored him but has not quite had enough exposure to other kids on his home turf to get the whole sharing his own toys thing,. Take home out of the equation, however, and it was perfect. They held hands and chased each other and it was great fun to watch them together. Mylo was an absolute Gem for the entire visit, he is such a lovely boy, I felt a bit guilty sometimes as he must have been a bit bored, I don't know how to deal with children who are not Nathaniel or at the very least Nathaniel's age. I have no experience with them whatsoever but it seemed to go fine. It is always nice to see the in-laws (really!) and Nate adores them.

Nate was spoiled for his birthday, of course. Thankfully not overwhelmed by the (badly) enforced restriction of one gift from anyone however most got around that by buying one gift that had many parts ( I am looking at you, Mum with your Thomas die-cast train case and a bag full of the individual trains - CHEAT) but all in all he got a damn good haul. Steph, who Nate continuously tells me he loves and her Mum Penny, bought him some dress-up outfits; Buzz, Woody and Spider-Man and he has been wearing them since.

Today we went to Lauriston Castle and made a ladybird friend.

And in much more exciting news, Nate overheard someone (me) saying 'fuck's sake' the other day and insists on repeating it every so often.

Also - Hooray. I got a gaming blog set up on my works magazine and apparently it is turning into quite the cult success. I need to re-play Killzone 3 so I can remember what I thought about it - now I have people actually reading what I write I best make it good.


LLAP

Superheroes...

I like Superheroes, they are awesome. Well, most of them are, some are a bit lame, some are hilariously awful but the bulk of them are awesome. I want Nate to like Superheroes, too. I sort of want him to be a comic book nerd; a gamer, book reader, film buff. Into science or computers. To be the guy who had Avengers posters on his wall as a teenager instead of pictures of some vapid FHM skank. The guy who wears glasses because he needs them and not because he is a wanky Hipster. Not the buck toothed, spotty stereotype of course but the one who gets the girl, like Peter Parker (not the creepy Toby Maguire incarnation). And it all starts with him liking Superheroes...

The keystone of the 'geek' foundations will be constructed from the things he is exposed to from an early age, these things will be influenced by us, his parents and we are, and this word will be overused in this post, geeks. We will pass our geek credentials to him, and him to his kids like some sort of sacred family legacy. It is a circle of life kind of deal. It is why his favourite toy is from a PS3 game (Sackboy), his favourite films are Pixar and he always wants to wear his Spider-man T-shirt - it is because I like them too. What it all all comes down to is that I want my son and I to have a common ground, a mutual interest we can share and appreciate together and I don't think that is wrong... is it? To want your child to be like you, but a better you, seems perfectly natural to me.

Nathaniel can say Batman, Spider-Man, Wolverine and Hulk - he recognises them. He takes his tiny Spider-Man figure and Sackboy toys with him everywhere. He sings 'na-na-na-na na-na-na-na BATMAN!' to me, he gets excited if any of these characters appear on TV and it all makes me smile more than it really ought to. It gives me this warm fuzzy feeling inside like I have succeeded in something fantastic. It is awesome. My son knows who Batman is! THIS IS AMAZING!...

Of course, if he doesn't explode when he sees the trailer to the next Marvel movie when he is a grown man I will still love him all the same and think he is the best boy in the whole world. Unless he becomes a nasty little chav who frequents establishments such as Lava and Ignite, if this happens then I will throw him in a bin, or lock him in the attic or do something akin to Clockwork Orange style aversion therapy.

The above also apply if he likes the Star Wars prequels.

YouTube Video

ress_location">Location:The Green,Edinburgh,United Kingdom

Hitting...

So, this week Nathaniel hit another kid for the first time. I wasn't entirely sure what to do, it seemed to be done out frustration not anger and it was definitely provoked.

The story is; we were at Tuesday playgroup, Nathaniel was running around saying hello to everyone and playing with toys as expected. He was in one of those cars that are sort of like bubbles that you control with your feet Flinstones style, you all know the ones I mean, and as he was trying to push himself forward this other little boy decided to hold onto the door so he was unable to push away - the boy in question had moments before shoved Craig (Julie-Ann's little boy) off a bike from behind so he could take it. At this point I was about two metres away and could hear Nathaniel asking him to get off, the little boy had that glazed over look in his eyes, he was staring at Nate but at the same time ignoring him entirely - he continued to hold the car. Nathaniel tried to push the boys hand away unsuccessfully, I could hear him becoming more and more frustrated and was preparing to go over and remove the child who was bothering him when it happened; Nathaniel lifted his hand from trying to push this kids unbelievably vice-like grip and started to sort of open palm slap at him, I could see he was not doing it full force, it was more like he was trying to beat his arm away a but it was definitely a form of aggression I have never ever seen from Nathaniel. The only thing Nathaniel tends to do is hit himself in the head if he is told off or cheekily throw his toys away from him but never, ever had he hit out at another person. He did kick Chris once but he was playing and it was hilarious) The kid didn't react at all, he just continued to gaze into the distance - clearly he was not being hurt, but he did take his hand away from the car.

Of course, the mother caught sight of it and did a 'OHMYGOD' face as if it was the most horrendous and heinous thing she had ever seen a child do and went to stop Nathaniel but I was there first. I took him from the car and sort of half heartedly told him he was being naughty and not to do that, more for the mothers benefit that anyone's as, if I am honest, I was a little bit proud of him for sticking up for himself. This may make me a terrible and immoral mother in the eyes of some but it made me smile a little inside to see Nathaniel do something other than be super sweet. Occasional naughtiness, mild screaming tantrums and hitting ones self in the head aside, Nate is bubbly, bouncy ball of joy and happiness. He wants to be friends with everyone, he shares his biscuits and (Sackboy not included) his toys and gives people cuddles and kisses. he is adorable, and sociable and says hello to strangers on buses. And now, he strikes back in the face of evil, yes, his striking out was rather half hearted as if he purposely chose to cause no real harm, but he did it. And I think that is natural and good. He was provoked, I think Nathaniel needed to do that lest he get walked all over and be forever weak. He has now established his place in the toddler pecking order. He is nice, but he will no longer take shit from other kids. When he lashes out and hits another child for no reason other than greed or malice then that will be a different story, he hit me on the leg the other day and he had a glimmer in his eye that told me he know he was being bad and he wanted to see my reaction, of course we scolded him and he straight away stopped, patted me on the head and said 'nice' but again, this is another step in the establishing of his place in the world, testing the water to see what is okay and what is not. I fully embrace all of these things as necessary moments that we get through and build the foundations of who he will be and what our relationship will be like; he will judge me by my reaction to what he does just as I react and praise or discipline appropriately to the actions he takes. This may sound like philosophical bullshit but I like to think that he realises when bad is bad and when it is necessary, that he knows that when I told him off after hitting that child that it was not the same as when he was told off for doing certain other things, that he knows he was justified in his actions but he ought to not have done it, really and he will, somewhere in his little toddler mind, respect me for acknowledging that with him.

Maybe I think to much about things.

Toilet Tourettes....

Well, this week has been enjoyable but also a hellish nightmare of illness and shite weather.

Nathaniel has been in fine spirits. He continues with his defiance but I am slowly but surely starting to be more relaxed when it comes to dealing with it. Me stressing out only makes him worse and then in turn stresses me out all the more, a viscous cycle of constant anxiety and freaking out which I have decided can't go on any longer and I have so far, as previously mentioned, been much better at checking myself before having a mental breakdown and shuddering through the day with worry weighing me down. Now don't get me wrong, Nathaniel is a lovely boy and barely misbehaves or really does anything to warrant such a massive meltdown as I tend to have all alone e in my mind. Recently he has been more demanding and less willing to give up on things when the answer is 'no' but he is just little and will eventually learn he can't always get what he wants. Smoothies, talking cat/dog/dinosaur app and Sackboy are the latest and greatest in terms of things he simply can't stand to be parted from. I mostly just feel guilty when I can't give him what he wants, or can't bear the idea of another second of him saying 'I see a cat' and having a crap CGI cat repeat it in a high pitched voice and he gets upset but he must learn, hard as it is for me to ever refuse him anything I must endure and put my parental foot down and get on with things. But as I was saying, he is 99% of the time a little gem who is a pleasure to be around and hilarious and sweet in every way... really...

That 1% of the time when he isn't mostly occurred yesterday. He was being a rogue of the highest nature and shouting no and laughing loudly whenever I asked him anything (including when I offered him cake, CAKE). fastforward to later in the afternoon and he came over, grabbed my arm and bloody well bit me as hard as he could. I pulled away and he laughed and rushed back to the safety of his distant car thing. I, of course, told him off, he laughed, I told him it was not funny, he laughed again and then realised I had told him off and started hitting himself in the head, as you do and protesting loudly in nonsense toddler talk. I decided to ignore him and did not look at him at all for a good four minutes and then I felt it, Nathaniel, slowly and softly taking hold of my arm again. I braced for another bite, waiting for it to happen, waiting to see if he had the balls to do it again and suffer my wrath....he was silent...  then I felt his little hand stroke my arm where he had bit me before. I looked down at him and he looked up at me with his big blue eyes and he said 'mummy... aww' while stroking my injury and then kissed my arm where he had previously chewed it. It damn near broke my heart, he is just so sweet and so went his 1% of daily naughty time.

Other things Nate has started to do
1) Blow bubbles and gargle his drinks instead of just drinking them and saying 'bubble'
2) Demanding I draw the things he wants to be drawn rather than drawing himself, ever.
3) Telling me when it is 'dinner time' and getting very annoyed if it is not ready that instant
4) Refusing to let me put water on his hands after allowing me to put pumpy soap on them
5) Laughing at his own farts
6) 'Hiding' things, then forgetting where he put them seconds later and getting sad

and finally 7, the title of this blog. Nathaniel likes privacy when he does his business, mostly poos, he will occasionally do an independent wee on the toilet but for the last two months has done all but two of his poos on the big boy bog but as I was saying - he likes his privacy. He demands I get out of the bathroom the second his bum hits the seat, that I lifted his lazy little ass on to. I do this, but allow myself to peek and make sure he is not trying to fumble his way into the cleaning cupboard (he has never done this) but generally I float around nearby waiting for him to shout that he is done only to come off, say bye-bye to what he has deposited, flush it and ask to be placed back on the porcelain. Recent events have made me think he wants me to leave as his bizarre bathroom habits are embarrassing and he does not want me to look at him while it happens...this thing is 'toilet tourettes'. Nathaniel shouts random, oft unrelated words out when he is in the midst of the 'big push'. Today he said 'WAFFLE!'  and 'Telly ON!, A CAT!' previously he has said things like 'Mummy, Daddy... WALL-E! All said with much effort and straining making it all the more hilarious - it doesn't really work in text, but I asssure you it is brilliant I walked in to check him while he was doing this once and he put his head in his hands... I swear it was shame.

So yes. I will maybe embellish this post with some videos and/or pictures (not of Nate demonstrating the above) but just of other things, maybe the bubble thing but for now, live long and prosper.

OH OH, we finally watched Bronson (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1172570/) last night. fantastic film. I am a bit ill with cold/head/sinus type badness so had the most horrendous fever dream which was clearly inspired by the sound and visuals in that film last night. But it was great, I recommend to all. Tom Hardy is number one awesome and I can't wait to see what he and Nolan do with bane in Dark Knight Rises.

And everyone must watch the Dead island trailer as it is beautiful, emotional and entirely gore-awesome! http://uk.ign.com/videos/2011/02/16/dead-island-announcement-trailer